Some tips and pointers, a few comments and musings that may help frame your focus and shed some light as you embrace more of the healing to set yourself free to live a more joyful life.

Be your own person

The world doesn’t need you to mimic or copy any other person; the other exists precisely to be and do that which they do. Life gives you life so you can be you, just you—wonderfully, beautifully, elegantly and irrepressibly YOU. We are all unique because we each have something different to bring and share with the world. You are encouraged to refrain from diminishing your significance in favour of people you have never seen, may never know and could never meet. There is no need to idolize or worship anything, simply love and accept yourself and let the real you that you wish and yearn to be, or enjoy expressing, be part of the world by the way you live your life and interact with yourself and others. It doesn’t matter whether many or even if any people like who you are; if it is who you are meant to be then authenticity and honesty demand you be that person. Find love for you and the notion that another could not love you on the level of spirit will be known as the impossibility that it is… 

Energy is everything

At the core, we are simply a bundle of energy and what shifts and changes, elevates or alters that energy is the quality of our consciousness that is to say of our thoughts and feelings, our intent and actions, our awareness and heartfulness. Some feeling states and emotions dampen our vibration or cause us to operate from a place of fear and survival, while other states of being are strong and positive, inspirational and transformational. Our life is a journey of mastery of not merely our thoughts and emotions but of life and living. To be the eye of the storm amidst chaos, to stand firm in your truth in the presence of naysayers and those who may dismiss or ridicule you, to have the courage on your own hero’s journey to pierce the veil that carries one through the dark night of the soul, that is testimony to the animated presence of your indomitable spirit. As much as we can clog, contort and confuse our energy we can also release the baggage, burden and barriers to open and allow, to heal and unify our energy into pureness, wholeness and aliveness. 

You are here to live your truth, have your experiences, and follow your heart

At times, the entangled web of comfort, security, duty and obligation, neediness or desperation can pull at the heart strings and make us feel bound or burdened to act in ways that are contrary to our heart’s wish or to our deepest joy. We can find ourselves remaining in places that no longer serve us or become unknowingly tethered to situations that do not speak to the ways in which we have, on some level, changed. Restriction ensues and yearning arises as we long to be free and this breeds both discontent and frustration. We can feel unconsciously controlled and impliedly caged by the views, attitudes, looks, and beliefs of others however incongruent or inconsistent with who we are and where we wish to go. Quite simply, if something is not working or does not bring us joy, then we are invariably impelled to find the joy in it and in ourselves and then align ourselves to it. It can take tremendous courage to stay the course and be willing to confront the elements of ourselves and the areas of life that seem to keep us stuck and hold us down. Finding your heart and living your passion is a noble path and yet it may entail releasing the baggage and resetting ourselves free of the patterns that seem to cloud and confuse us, or hijack our intuition through programs and patterns that are calibrated to fan old emotional reactions and dysfunctional thinking states that lead us to create what we have created previously. Observing clearly and knowing truly what you are being through what is arising in your life can be a powerful tool to see whether we are aligned truly to our heart.

No limits only limitations

There are, in truth, no limits yet many limitations. Those limitations exist, in most cases, for good reason or to protect and serve the human form. Other times, the limitations are simply learnt and therefore seem hereditary because if we spend a sustained or prolonged period of time in someone’s energy we can begin to unconsciously enter harmonic resonance or entrainment with them. So you may have energetically agreed or unconsciously learnt ways of viewing life or of holding perceptions and subscribing to certain beliefs that are inconsistent with who you choose to be or become. There is a process or path of unlearning, releasing and dissolving such things, and sometimes it is instant while at other times it takes a while, and for some the process can take a lifetime. It just is what it is. And, viewed in this way, some people would rather take a more measured and glacial approach while enjoying the many other things in life… And this, too, is absolutely perfect. Remember, we have all of eternity and as you are guaranteed to arrive at the appointed place, eventually at the right time for you, we can all choose and that is the beauty of life.

You are having a human experience at the moment

You are living as a human in this lifetime and in your humanness you can think or feel things that are not the truth but which appear to be true. You can believe things that are not true and can have all manner of experiences and encounters as if they were true. You can feel all alone, entirely messed-up and a long way from any place of home. Home for many of us, whether in this lifetime or from our unconscious memory of home in the spiritual sense, is a place where we felt loved, honoured, appreciated, respected, enjoyed, nurtured, seen, allowed, included, nourished and free. In our human lives, then, it can be quite simple to realise when we are feeling hurt or pained, unwell or off-balance, and invariably our needs mirror or reflect that absence of what we know to be our true essence, eternal blueprint or soul experience, and so we can be starving even though we are overweight or obese because we are hungry for nurturing and nourishment; we can be promiscuous and reckless because we are deprived of connection and intimacy, we can be frustrated and angry because we feel distant from peace and tranquillity. As humans, we often see things outside of ourselves as symbols or representations of what we think we need to be happy and often misinterpret the simple yearnings for things like connecting with a friend, laughing about life or being looked at with loving eyes as requiring certain extravagant desires in order to intensely reveal the extent of which we crave something by the richness by which we delve into counterfeit experiences that still leave us feeling empty and unfulfilled. Remember, if you think you need something outside of you, it is often because you refused to give yourself that very same energy of externalised thing to a part within yourself, to yourself. Being your spirit in human form consciously is often the antidote to the searching and the panacea of all our wanting. Awakening to what is within us, always, and embracing it as a living embodiment while human and alive is a purpose that is as meaningful as it is powerful.

Your inner child

Some land in adulthood in biological age only, never having really had a childhood, teenage hood or young adulthood. Perhaps trauma or some other forms of distress wielded an impact that pulled them out of the present moment and lurched them in a flight-fight-freeze mode that means they are torn apart internally as if disassembling while quarantining the raw, intense and unprocessed experience into parts of their body or being to be dealt with at a later time, a time when there is space and safety to finally and fully resolve. Yet, the intensity of life with its constancy and pace can mean it never truly is dealt with and properly resolved. So many wind up in adulthood dealing with adult issues without the level of adjustment, growth and access to inner resources to fully handle what happened to their younger selves. Looking down and dishevelled, their ability to fully access their best and most beautiful aspects of playfulness, joyfulness and tenderness seems stunted and stilted. We are left in a precarious even perilousness situation of being a trapped at a young age waiting for our own release and to have the kinds of nurturing and nourishing experiences that enrich us to blossom in our own heart to be our highest potential. Without true healing, the inner child roams rebelliously and often relentlessly, running amok in the life of an adult creating more dysfunction and distortion from the unhealed, unprocessed, unhappy aspects that are held in darkness and ostensibly isolated from the loving vibration of their own heart. Being childlike is beautiful at all ages, yet being childish can often reveal itself when a 60-year-old behaves like an 8-year-old in response to life events or as a form of reactivity based on maladjusted and non-integrated parts. Life can present us with challenges and yet we can also find ways to grow through and transcend them to become wiser, stronger, and clearer from them.

You are not one thing but many things

You can do, be and live many different things simultaneously. Many are a son or daughter, a lover or beloved, a partner, an employee, a friend or agent, a husband or wife, a father or mother, a body and a mind, a soul and a person, and then there are many other things… You can, and may well be, a sportsperson, an artist, an entrepreneur, a writer, a leader, a speaker, a cook, a good listener, a performer, a conversationalist, a master, a therapist, a friend, a visionary, and a whole host of other things … and many more different things across time or in your lifetime. Allow yourself the freedom to explore and choose, learn and discover to be in and one with the flow of all of life. To be guided by your heart and to discern with your heart-mind what is the most appropriate for you in this moment… When we deny or deride the expression of part of ourselves, the expression of which may serve to live out what may heal us, it can create more havoc and congest our energy. To sit with no judgement and in open, loving kindness towards ourselves is no small feat yet a wonderfully auspicious gift that we can give ourselves.

Instant Gratification & Impatience

The mind sees and wants. The mind notices and compares. The mind processes and analyses. The mind is a wonderful tool, but reliance on it alone, or even predominantly, rarely produces a rich or meaningful, loving or beautiful life. The mind is somewhat impressionable and can be seduced at times and at others it can be turned against you, even by you! This frequently happens when someone who is generally happy and balanced comes across another person they perceive as having more or as having a better life or who, after seeing an advertisement or watching television then decides that there is something, by reason of what they have now seen, that means their life or they themselves are either missing or lacking in some way. The desire to improve and change can propel action, and sometimes that fuels the very success to purchase the thing desired. Usually, though, given current commitments and budgetary constraints, the desire for it subsides before it can be acquired yet the process of having desired can create such upheaval and mayhem in the psyche of an individual that they are exhausted, unbalanced and, over time, become resentful with themselves and angry about their life. Anything worthwhile is often a process of obtaining over time. Not always, but usually. Yet, truth be told, most things that you REALLY want are not found in shopping centres, car yards, auction houses or in the world. They are uncovered and revealed in you as the being of love and light that you are… This is often why those with many things may look lost and lifeless, they seem to have made it according to the world’s definition of success yet within, if unaware and unawakened, can feel anything but successful if not downright miserable. The true currency or life, or real treasure they seek, is the light of joy that emanates from having a close and continuing connection to their awakened, grounded spirit. Without that, nothing in this world, or indeed even everything in this world, will not suffice or cannot satiate. For you, yes, you, are in truth not of this world, so you cannot be bought or bartered, bargained for and bullied by things of this world for they are not the true source or real origin of life, of creation or of the power you are, so they alone cannot entertain, distract or satisfy you for long. Many have tried and tried again and, of course, it is utterly beautiful to have all the things this world has to offer to enjoy and experience as part of your time here, but if it comes without the corresponding consciousness having been lived and present as a way of being it rarely keeps one happy.

Your greatest friend and greatest love is YOU

You and only you come and leave this place as a single human being. You live in your head, in your body and in your life. You are a separate and distinct body albeit connected to others. No one outside of you can ever, will ever and ‘should’ ever replace you or be considered someone you cannot live without. Of course, it happens, for in the realm of limitless possibilities that, too, is a possibility. And that, too, may be entirely what someone has chosen or needs to experience. Having said that, very often, that process, once learnt or experienced, can create entanglements or entwine individuals to the point where the situation can become toxic and dysfunctional and remain so even though each have chosen to sever the connection and part ways. It can happen in families, in romantic relationships or even with co-workers. The point is that you, yourself, are the only thing that ‘you’ appear to have ‘here’ when all else leaves, and it is truly the you beneath the body that is life and is looking for ways to consciously commune with the life that you are while still embodied. You need no other. Remember, this is simply another perspective and it is not intended to represent the way or absolute truth, just a perspective: all it asks is that you be open-minded, or perhaps open to looking within to find the answer(s) for yourself, because we will only ever truly feel liberated and empowered when we come to know the truth, and that truth is that all exists and lives within you… Anything less and anything else means and makes you dependent on anything, and that then makes you feel like you are something less than the perfect, whole and complete Being that you are, always have been, and always will be! You are the constant in your life and there is a boundless, bountiful love within your own heart that is meant for you.

Interconnected, intersecting, interwoven

Many of us live predominantly from aspects and parts of us we perceive as likeable or strong, as convenient to express or serving a purpose that helps us ‘get through’ the day in a way that contains the least amount of friction or restriction. Yet, to heal is to come from our fully-integrated, whole and alive self that is a unified being and not simply one part. If we think of ourselves only physically and sexually then we can come to overuse and tax ourselves sexually while divorcing ourselves from the heart-based intimacy of an experience that would come if we allowed our expression to come from a loving space of our heart intermingled, too, with an aligned focused of our mind and the fertile thoughts that mentally and therein emotionally supported our way of being. You see, if we live exclusively from one aspect and neglect other parts, our behaviour belies belief and can appear distorted or uninspiring, for our focus in having achieved perhaps some or limited success in one area, like having secured an encounter, may equally reveal abject failure in other aspects of our lives that show we are emotionally vapid, mentally closed, energetically unavailable and courting unsustainable habits and unhelpful patterns. This is not intended to pass judgment but rather share deep insights that may enhance awareness so that we can look deeper and be willing to truly embark on the journey that opens us up to experience a richer, fuller life built on authenticity, profundity and integrity.

Be gentle and kind to yourself

The movement of things, the frenzied activity of the world, with its whirling and swirling, it’s stressing and rushing around, can create the perception that the world is a harsh, unkind, even unwelcoming environment. Indeed, not all places are like that, but for those who live in big cities it can certainly feel like that in particular moments. Yet, there are those who live in quite tranquil surrounds and the seeming absence of external mayhem is juxtaposed by the obvious internal chaos of their own thoughts, feelings and emotions that dart and dissect, invade and run riot within them as if an emotional tornado was brewing through the torrent of mental activity. Being human is no easy feat and certainly very challenging. So, as you experience life, hold compassion for yourself, express love to yourself, be gentle with your process of becoming and growing, of living and learning… There is no time stamp or time limit, and nothing needs to be experienced, though your mind and ego may protest otherwise. Wage not war within, harbour not discontent or anger toward yourself, be not impatient or unkind to yourself—this life you live, have lived, are living, and will live is entirely as you we have chosen to live it, that we may have created it on a soul or unconscious level does not alter this truth. So, now, invite yourself to create consciously to be at cause with what has been chosen and that you are now choosing to create. Live in alignment with your life, loving yourself as you and for the way you are living. Making peace with this moment is about making peace with yourself. It is one and the same thing. You can always infuse your life with more love or kindness by being aware of how you treat (or behave towards) yourself.

Lonely or alone

There is a fundamental difference. Each of us feels or has felt lonely on some level. In fact, it is not strange or bad or wrong. Fact is, we are all spiritual beings, and so we ought to feel like ‘aliens’ in some sense by simply living in a human body and on this planet. Yet, there is also the loneliness that comes to people who are yet to find like-minded, kindred spirits or a place where they belong in the world. Indeed, there are those who are so busy being popular and surrounded by others that they dread the last moments of night or in the morning when they must be with themselves, a self they are yet to know or learn about. Befriending yourself is the best and surest way to realize you are never alone. Some say that there are thousands of unseen or celestial beings of love and light, near or around you, in fact, your room is crowded with them, and yet we are shut off to seeing or feeling them such that their presence seems unknown to us. They are there, yet it is little comfort if you feel lonely. When all is said and done, and no matter what you create or where your life takes you, the only thing you can count on during your time here on Earth is that you will be you, that you will be in your body and with yourself no matter whether you are single or married, with people or in solitude, have children or live in nature. The single, constant thing is that you are with you, yourself, and that you are where you are. The greatest, most powerful and liberating thing you can do is actually befriend yourself, be there for you, listen to you, allow you to be. If you are one with your feelings and heart, do what you feel guided to do and you will not only come to enjoy your own company, you will place yourself first for you will finally be attuned to what you want, who you are and where you wish to be, and in that space you are not only more alive and more empowered, you are highly attractive and closer to being self-actualised, for you are clear in yourself, you are in-flow with your Being… What more could you ask for, really? In turn, and in time, you may then find that, as an outward extension of that self-same love, you naturally and organically connect to your own tribe or clan. To feel the support and nourishment that comes from a sense of community is not only special and sacred, it is stunning.

Slipstreams

Sometimes, there is a gap or space between leaving something and starting another thing. That gap can be frustrating or it can be seen as entirely perfect—perfect for it enables us to jettison the old, consolidate what’s left and integrate what we are and have learnt, preparing to launch into the new when the right opportunity presents itself. Indeed, sometimes we purposely hold ourselves back because our energy is not ready, or the world is not ready, for what we have to share. Sometimes, we simply cannot receive the next step or take the most appropriate action because our maturity or understanding around a possible benefit or gain may be insufficient. In other words, our mind and emotions may require greater grounding or attunement in order to properly realize and return to the dynamic flow of life such that we can receive it. Sometimes, the slipstreams of change can mean that, while we are ready for the next thing, the uncharted territory into which we are diving and heading necessarily asks that pause to be maintained while more of the map reveals itself before we can move forward…

Sticky residue

Trauma, like any difficult events, can tend to be so impactful that it almost leaves an icky trail, like an oil slick through water, which taints our view, causing us to peer through the trauma as a filter to seeing life. The trauma then shapes our lens and can distort our view such that we loop ourselves into a feeling state that keeps us tethered to and reinforcing the downward spiralling feelings arising from the trauma itself. As a result, we can tend to re-attract through our constant attention and thereby reinforce the difficult by letting it dictate the next occurrence that arises in our reality. Like a merry-go-round, we seem to keep seeing what we are feeling and therein keep believing that this is our life, a cycle that feels mutually reinforcing and self-fulfilling as a prophecy that we wield if not inflict against ourselves. Sometimes, we need to STOP, just stop and observe, to truly see and take stock of where we are and choose to create anew but letting the wash-back of past patterns clear out and refrain from permitting our standardised, habitual reactions from fuelling the energetic momentum of the past experiences from which we wish to truly be liberated. At these times, it may be beneficial to research carefully for help and healing from professional and allied health practitioners whose methods or modalities may best serve us on our path to greater health and wellness but also awareness and fulfilment.

Mirror, mirror

So often in life we point out in others what we are also in ourselves. We seem to criticise and castigate the very patterns we sponsor but suppress without realising that no amount of subterfuge or fancy footwork can tiptoe or tap dance around the truth. If we are disturbed or distressed by something another does then chances are we also, in our own way, inflict that same behaviour on ourselves and others in ways we disavow and disown. We are annoyed for the parts that know the truth call us out on our judgement and hypocrisy while also calling us to heal those disparate and fragmented parts by permitting them the loving awareness of our consciousness. Yet it can be confronting to admit we are being the very thing we despise and it can fuel self-delusion, self-loathing and self-sabotage. Yet, without the light of truth, we often unconsciously condemn ourselves to slavishly repeat it incessantly, almost addictively over and over. True awareness can detect the weakness or mistake in perception and once truly seen can release it like outworn clothes that are left to the side or that one can walk freely away from without being emotionally charged or unresolved. Observation can become your liberation when used to notice your inner feeling state with space and stillness, then what seems to distract and disturb can become the gift that teaches you what remains to be healed within such that you and your energy may return to even greater health and wholeness.

Letting Go

Of all the things that will best serve you in life, letting go is perhaps the most understated, least mentioned, and truly often the only thing any of us can really do. Life happens. Things unfold. We make choices. People around us do things, sometimes even things we might view as abhorrent, deplorable and seemingly unspeakable. Still, each of us is called to face what unfolds. Of course, we can then choose, again. Hopefully, we shall respond or change in the face of what happens, yet, in truth, our greatest reliever of pain and our best action in the face of anything is simply to let go, to surrender fully to this moment of being here now. What was is no longer—surrender; what is is not what we wish—surrender; what is happening is not what we thought—surrender; we have lost something—surrender; we are no longer living the life we strove to live or believe we deserve or earnt—surrender. You see, there is not a single thing for which surrender and therein acceptance is not in some way a true panacea and so its application is as broad as your remembrance to resort to it. In fact, in the very moment that things happen, with extreme urgency and total shock, surrender is very well the first and only thing we can do. Surrender is powerful for it reminds us of who we are in truth. It calls us to profoundly that there is deeper knowing, a divine perfect, an absolute order that is occurring on the level of spirit and that nothing that happens here is ever really you—that you may add or subtract, multiply or decimate all things in this life or which you seek to combine or blend with yourself whether they be possessions or assets, ideas or thoughts, beliefs or attitudes and still, at the end of the day, they are not you, they are simply things that are attachments or external to you. Often, the more of those things occur or attach the less connection we have to that part of us that is authentic, true and clear… Not always, yet external things, even if only beliefs and thoughts, can be distractions. The point is that when life unfolds and seemingly personally catastrophic events arise, acceptance is the only internal response that can bring us into harmony and alignment with what is. It is surrender that often seems the most intolerable and inappropriate action that we can take and yet it is, in truth, the only thing. You may equate surrender with condoning or acquiescing yet this is a misunderstanding by the mind. Surrender is stepping aside with mind so that the higher will and greater knowing yourself and life may prevail. Ultimately, anything can be taken from us or lost, at any time, even our own physical life, and so the power of surrender to heal and transform is miraculous.

Retain your power

None of us can profess or presume to know anything and certainly nothing more than you know about yourself. Know this: You and only you know what is best for you. Yet sometimes we are so shut down or locked outside of ourselves that we can’t access or receive our own inner wisdom. Even so, and while you may be prompted to find answers, you don’t need to give your power away or give it over to another. Too often, when we think someone else is or has more, knows more than us or even is more attractive than us, we hand over all ourselves, even selling our soul, just so that they like us. Unfortunately, doing so only reveals how lost we are and, indeed, how little love and faith we have in ourselves. No one else needs your power, they have their own. You need yours. If you give away your power to someone else, you are, in truth, burdening them with a responsibility that is not theirs and leaving yourself disempowered in the process. Indeed, eventually, in order to move forward and progress your life, you will need to reclaim your power and get yourself back together, so to speak. Reclaim your power and come back to your beautiful heart. Live from your heart, breathe from your heart.

Struggle and hardship

Not always but often, and certainly more commonly in the past, it was through difficulty, hardship, and suffering that people grew for they are the very processes of refinement and polishing that not only build character but reveal it. They serve to test the veracity of people or place them on accelerated crash-courses in order that they can learn a lot about themselves and life quickly. Often, they are the way-showers, the visionaries or leaders that pave the path through wakefulness and wisdom for others to walk and live.

True benchmarks

The best compass of truth or benchmark for yourself is how you feel inside, not where you are going or what you are doing. Often, we look for external accolades, accomplishments and rewards instead of the extent of connection to self, our level of joy, depth of intimacy, quality of relationships, capacity to love, degree of aliveness, measure of enthusiasm and inspiration… It is possible that you may be the most amazing person and soul that ever walked the earth and still no one will ever know you this life, except your immediate family. Indeed, you may be talented and beautiful with much to offer the world and still fame and fortune, success and acknowledgement may elude you. Conversely, you may have limited skills and have little to say and yet have immense wealth and power… Neither is a problem. The issue arises when we consider that evidence of external recognition or reward is proof certain that we are enough, that we are worthy, that we are something, and only then does our life have value and meaning. Very often, the process of attaining success and money involves choices and trade-offs that result in people eroding their truth to the point where they lose their footing, become ungrounded and then find they attract the kind of people who do not really like them but like the power they wield or money they hold, and resultantly all their years of striving result in them feeling like their life is meaningless. Again, not a certainty merely a potential outcome, which seems to have a fair degree of regularity.

Values and virtues

In the world, it is often easy to lose sight of the things that truly matter and, in time, values can be compromised or reduced, sidelined or jettisoned in the belief that we are getting something that we want when, in truth, we are simply ‘losing’ who and what we are. It is not uncommon to see ruthless players in the business world who have sold out so many times the game is all they have, for they have lost contact with their own humanity, their own soul. The mind, or person, thinks that money and power ought or needs to trump values and virtues. Truth is, without values and virtues there is nothing; we are nothing. Values and virtues are the very backbone of all interactions, and instead of being the first casualties of negotiation, they deserve to be the cornerstone of any business transaction. Without them, everyone gets burnt. Still, we tolerate the inexcusable so frequently that it becomes not only permissible, it seems acceptable. It takes a true leader to ‘take a stand’ and draw a line in the sand, to unassailably do the right, honourable, ethical and humane thing. We can draw upon and infuse any outcome with the right energy whether that is equity, fairness, justice and good conscience; however, it takes a strong and outspoken individual to stand up inside themselves and then in the world in order for that to actually be the outcome. You are that person!

Like energy attracts like energy

Call it what you will, but the fact remains that like attracts like, and similar energies are magnetised or drawn to each other. Some people think karma draws a situation to you, and perhaps that is so, yet, in truth, it is the true, underlying or sponsoring energy that draws something to you. If you come from anger and behave angrily towards another then you will attract that to you because, in effect, you are it. You are being angry, so, naturally, angry situations are innately and automatically invited into your life. The surface may reveal something else, yet the underlying energy is similar. It has been said that the ‘outside of you is the inside of me, or the outside of me is the inside of you.’ At other times, when the energy or vibration is similar it is simply that it takes time to see on the surface who someone is deep down. When negative or unpleasant things happen, we can become stultified or even go berserk internally trying to make sense and all I can say is that all sorts of things happen for all sorts of reasons, and just because they happen it does not condone or permit someone to be anything other than loving and honest, responsible or decent. Things can happen for all sorts of reasons: (a) you can choose an event on a soul level, or as part of a soul contract to learn something, and therefore deliberately orchestrate for an event to unfold exactly as you choose in order to have a certain experience; (b) you can have an experience occur in order to activate certain qualities in you or help you to become stronger or clearer in who you are in the face of it or who you would choose to be; (c) you can create a troubling experience to help sever or jettison your connection with someone in such a way that it leaves no doubt about your need to move forward and in an entirely different direction; (d) it can be a form of learning and growing based on how you once behaved towards others or indeed yourself, and therefore act as a reminder of who you have once been either in this life, or, by extension, through your past lives, or, if not that, of something that has been in your family or generational line; (e) and so on and so forth, the list of possible reasons or outcomes is numerous, and different for each person.

Everything is part of everything

Everything exists or occurs because it serves some purpose in the totality of things and is an energy that constitutes part of the whole of all that is. To deny or exclude anything is to deprive yourself of an energy that may be entirely appropriate when Being or living who you are. You may be a wholly loving person, but this does not mean that you deny being an aggressive person if that is what is required in an appropriate situation. In some situations where surrender is required, you may also need to be strong and aggressive. Other times, you may need to be fearful in order to actually appreciate the gravity of a situation or the inherent risks involved to safeguard your humanness. Again, everything is choice. And yes, while love ultimately is the energy of all and the only true energy of everything, until we can truly hold the vibration of love, and operate from that energy in all that we do, we may need to sponsor other energies in the course of our lives and as we navigate through life.

Blow the whistle

Nothing surprises me more than people who witness incorrigible and illicit deeds or corrupt and contemptuous practices of people or corporations and sit idly by, saying nothing. Raise the alarm; speak your truth; say something… Perhaps your purpose in being an honest person placed in surrounds riddled by corruption is precisely to honour your truth and expose that corruption in some way as you feel appropriate and in a way that preserves your wishes about how you wish to live your life—sometimes, simply moving away from or out of a particular person’s life or a place of work is all that is required for people to get the message. At other times, a telephone call to the relevant authorities is required, and at other times it may require contacting the press or mass media. Again, this is not a judgment of right or wrong, or good or bad, it is simply sometimes about being true with yourself, your heart, and your virtues. Indeed, sometimes, nothing needs to be done, and you can simply let it go or let it be. Perhaps it is for another to report or for they themselves to awaken to what they do. Regardless, in each situation, be guided by what you feel in your heart is the right thing to do and then act, and act regardless of what happens, for that is your truth and your purpose. You see, when someone acts contrary to the generally-accepted standards of conduct, behaviour or principles that we choose to live by, then we all, yes all, pay for the infraction as an encroachment and violation of our own health and safety, as a lessening and curtailment of our own liberty or freedom or dwindling and reduction of our own wealth and abundance. More often than you realize, silence is tantamount to forbearance, if not acquiescence. Be sensible about the intervention; sometimes, it simply requires a single, simple telephone call placed anonymously and confidentially to discharge your responsibility, at other times it may require you to send a letter or offer assistance in some way. As humans, so many people have the power of speech, or the power of observation, or the power of presence, and they simply walk away or elect to turn away from the situation, and sometimes this is not only perfect it is absolutely mandatory. However, at other times, it may be entirely appropriate and necessary to do something, so do it!

Fearful having nothing to fear

It strikes me as peculiar that those who live in fear are very often the ones who have nothing to fear. The honest, decent, industrious, ethical, moral and kind people of the world seem to live in fear of those who simply sponsor such activities that serve them regardless of who they harm or hurt or however immoral or unloving. Yet, I say this, they can be who they are, and yet you who are loving subscribe to a higher love and are aware of who you – and we all – are in truth, so be not afraid. You may not be able to control others yet this does not mean you need to anything but love yourself and honour what loving yourself means. Succumb not to fear, simply honour what loving yourself directs or guides you to do. Challenging situations may arise, and sometimes it means taking a stand or moving to a place where like energy exists to suit who you are. Yet, still, I say that is not something to fear. Act with alignment to your self-love and self-care and with who you are. 

Feel what you’re feeling

As a race, humans have forgotten how to feel. Indeed, many of us are dismissive of or sceptical of our feelings. Yet, our feelings are meant to serve and reveal to us how we are reading, perceiving or responding to a situation. We only seem to want to feel certain feelings and then bury and suppress the ones that don’t suit us or which are contrary to our need to feel happy or pleased. People are not machines; we are highly-sentient, intuitively-aware, energetically-sensitive, extremely-fragile beings who feel and think, hear and see, touch and smell and we do so on a range of levels that extend far beyond the physical and include the metaphysical and energetic levels of our Being.

Integrity with self

Invariably, we learn from a young age to be anything but ourselves, to fit into other systems, obey rules, comply with others’ beliefs and assume their often unstated (yet indicative) expectations of us in order to remain in resonance and harmony with them, and to secure their love. The process of disowning our own truth and denying our own instinct is as much about survival as it is about belonging. Yet, there comes a time when we can pretend to be anything to everyone, and be so outwardly focused we forget who we are, what we like and indeed what even makes us happy. The layers of self-deception and self-denial are varied as they are extensive. Sitting with our feelings and opinions, beliefs and thoughts and remaining aligned to them can help us see whether our perception of what is has shifted or whether we have simply lost sight of who we are…

Simple yet complex

Most things can be distilled to very simple things, and those things ultimately all fall under the auspices of the banner of love. Yet, we all love differently and have differing opinions, needs, expectations and views on or about love, including how it arises, when it is expressed, the intensity, how it registers for us and so on and so forth. Some seek love to feel good, others do so to commune with a kindred spirit, and others do so to stave off the feeling and fear of loneliness. Amidst all the love, there are people with their own views, baggage, perceptions, upbringing, genes, personality, beliefs, past lives, future expectations, desires, programs, fears, insecurities and so on… With all the stuff going on in the average human being is it any wonder they struggle to get out of bed in the morning, let alone find someone who will actually be in a relationship with them and for a significant period of time? Realise that you can only ever know as much as you can about yourself and another. Sometimes, you need to let others be and focus on healing yourself for that is what you can do to determine who you attract, in essence, into your life. And realise that we, in our humanness, make mistakes because we don’t know better or rather we don’t fully see or appreciate the impact of what we are doing has on others. And even when we do, we simply cannot know how else to behave because we know no different and we cannot teach ourselves to behave differently until we grow more, see more or experience more. Realise that there is a lot more going on than meets the eye, or that you can see, at times.

Here to grow

You mind has many other plans, but your soul is here to learn and grow, to progress and advance. You know this in your heart, and this is why sometimes you enter a relationship or other times you leave a relationship even though it is perfectly harmonious and beautiful. The fact that we rarely discuss or mention the very thing – namely our soul – that is governing and dictating our entire experience in this realm is not only absurd, it is entirely bizarre! If we learnt to listen to and be more aware of our emotional and mental bodies much of the heartache and pain associated with moving on, or transforming, would be lessened and greeted with a greater acceptance and surrender. Sometimes, we diverge from others because they have chosen to move in a direction that does not sponsor our growth or we choose to grow at a faster rate and doing so strains our connection or point of resonance. Other times, our relationship has served its purpose, run its course, and has a time and place and a season.

No guarantees or assurances

Often, we may know the grand plan and have a sense of where we are going, yet the details are sketchy. Rightly so, if we knew the details we may avoid the actions or imperil ourselves in ways not intended for us. You may wish to marry and have children yet find that the person you love does not wish to marry you, or if you do they are incapable of having children, or, if all else progresses, you may decide to have a divorce only five (5) years into the marriage. There are a myriad of choices and millions of combinations of outcomes and occurrences that can eventuate and few ever really tend to meet with the approval of your mind, which is often why some people are bitter and annoyed, angry and resentful. Be open to life, have preferences but acknowledge that there is a perfect plan that you, yourself, have agreed to and be willing to honour and walk the path that you have chosen albeit that you may not remember it. We can observe the unfoldment in a state of patience and grace, choosing to respond with a sense of empowerment focused towards exercising choice based on awareness and awakening—that is truly where our power resides.

Defy the conventional

There are many people who will never get married in their life and others who will never even be in a romantic relationship. Others still may never have sex and may not even be attracted to the opposite sex. Some may live their life with complete joyful bliss in solitude and others may be so busy they don’t even feel. Some people may live in a prison, others in hospital and some may die before the age of four years of age. Some may be assaulted at a young age, and others may be homeless for most of their lives. The point is life unfolds in a messy, spontaneous and often uncontrollable and unpredictable way. The normal, ordinary or conventional is just not what life is meant to be for some or indeed anyone. For even in the lives that appear to unfold normally or those that seem conventional, if you look closely there are aspects that to anyone else will seem entirely abnormal or dysfunctional. So you can never judge or view a life by what is happening on the outside or by reference to the dictates of the majority or of society. Some people would, and do, go ‘crazy’ if you try to impose a stricture or way of life on them that many or most may deem normal. Other people simply don’t wish to go to a certain place or do a certain thing. Some people may never have children, others may never work, and some people may simply find friendship this lifetime through their pets. Again, no life is better or worse than any other, just different.

Nothing is proof of anything

Long ago, I realized that you simply cannot look at things and assume they are right or wrong, good or bad. Some of the most interesting and spiritually evolved and loving souls I have come to know and found lived lives most people would abhor or find repugnant or would be considered outcasts or pariahs. You may find a good Christian working at a brothel and someone who is choosing this life to be a nasty, mean-spirited individual going to church every other day. What someone does does not speak necessarily to who they are, and even what someone does rarely tells you of who they are. The most ardent criminal still has love at their core, and indeed may have been quite loving in this life but lost their way or had their heart hurt beyond recognition. Perception and judgment can leave us thinking that people in suits are trustworthy when they could be the most dishonest, and on the flipside societal views around fringe behaviours associated with certain types of music, or piercings, haircuts or hair colourings, tattoos or even the use of certain medications or even drugs mean that you have an idea of the person or of their morals, character or belief. The only way to get to know someone is to spend time with them, and even then you may only know where they have been or what they have done not really who they are. Who they are, in essence, we know because we too are the same. Yet, this is said to remind you that nothing you see or that happens is ever any proof of anything.

Focus to fruition

What you focus on, whether positive or negative, has a tendency to manifest and be magnetized into your life. The energy of your focus and the substance of the your focus is what draws it to you, and so saying, “I don’t want to be poor,” or, “I’ve had enough suffering,” results in re-attracting the operative words like, ‘suffering’ and ‘poor’. Of course, this is only one aspect of the point of focus. It is true, too, that things you really and truly wish for on a heart level are also drawn to you, when you focus on them. The point is that distinguishing between the mind’s lust for something and the heart’s true choice can be muddy at times! Bear in mind, too, that, aside from divine timing and any underlying beliefs contrary to your choices, one is always encouraged to choose yet hold that choice merely as an open preference not an absolute certainty, for in so doing you may block and filter out, exclude or deny the things you really are meant to have and experience albeit the packages in which they come do not meet, match or marry up with the perception anticipated by the mind!

I don’t have the answers, you do!

This can seem like little comfort and paltry solace when you are enduring the most harrowing of times, or when life is difficult to say the least, and you remain confused, yet it still holds true. No one is a higher authority or has more power over or in your life than you. Only you know what is best for you; only you, with time, learn how to navigate through life in a way that best speaks to your heart. Yet, along the way, we may consult with or seek out the help of others, not to replace but to supplement or aid our own guidance systems.

Accepting what is

One of the hardest lessons in life, and it seems to be a lifelong process, is the process of accepting what is before us and what has occurred in our lives. Very often, we have chosen or want something and that which occurs seems divergent from or inconsistent with our wish, and naturally we feel frustrated, even angry, at what has arisen. If this happens consistently, then we can easily become demoralized, dispirited and this can contribute to a sense of hopelessness and powerlessness. Realising that what has occurred before you is a product of creation, often your own, and simply allowing it to be there does not prevent you from creating the life you choose, it simply means you need to be aware of what it is that you are really choosing and therein really creating. You have your whole life to create, and correct or tinker with your choices based on what has arisen, and so you shall. Getting stuck with what has occurred or unfolded can result in you being stunted or blocked from moving forward. Much wisdom comes from or is unearthed through intense hardship for the absence of external movement or any forward momentum can evidence a process of going deeper, as part of an intense excavation and strengthening exercise that one is accessing and is consumed by. So, even when nothing is happening, much is occurring. Indeed, this too is highly dissatisfying to the mind that feels unaware of or unable to chart its progress, and so, again, acceptance is born from the depths of one’s true self, and this energy has the capacity to dissolve and disperse, clear and release the protestations of the mind and the toxic emotions that arise with it. Remember, we all have aspects, habits, behaviours or idiosyncrasies that if we choose to dwell on or analyse them would often irritate and annoy us.

You are never right, though you can believe you are

We all do what we think and believe is right for us, and sometimes we also wish to impress or impose our notion of right or wrong on others. Obviously, there is much common ground in how we relate and what we believe, yet there is also much that is hidden from our understanding and which is only triggered during the course of truly coming to know another and their beliefs. Many a person has felt thrown under a bus when they are in relationship with someone who has cheated on them. And, sometimes, when we look at both sides we see what very different views we have towards each other. Some people say they commit infidelity in order to keep the relationship with their spouse alive and not to abandon them by leaving them but to remain there as well; other times they reveal that their identity is entwined with needing validation and reassurance from new people in order to alleviate their own inadequacies and insecurities or to seek attention and affection they cannot give themselves while their partner is busy focusing on their job and their children; and other times people in failing to communicate do not know how to leave one relationship and so need to do things that make it clear that, in time, they will not be allowed to stay in their current relationship. There are also times when people in living in a certain way reveal that they are so used and accustomed to being in a relationship they know not how to be with themselves or single and so rush to fill the potential void with another person even before their current relationship has ended. And other times, it is habitual, they simply run from relationship to relationship because that is what ‘feels good’ and ‘feels right’ for them, until it doesn’t. Each of us have differing temperaments and boredom thresholds, and some people simply look outside of relationships to solve their issues, and others simply think that the answer lies in everyone and everything but themselves. The path of each is different and all we can ever possibly know is what we feel beyond what is beyond said, and how we feel in relation to how someone is Being and by that alone can we act or communicate.

Many a minor thing has been magnified or distorted over time in relationships wherein neither party realises how similar or reflective a behaviour or encounter with someone is reminiscent of a prior hurt, prior relationship, prior encounter or indeed one’s own parent. In seeking to check out and divert attention, they can run away from the memory by excluding the person only to find it showing up in the next relationship or colleague, or boss or someone else, and they have to deal with it again. Remember, only you can decide how you choose to live and what you choose to do with your life. And what is right for you may be wrong for another, or entirely inappropriate, so be wary of what you think another should do or how you believe you can impose your opinions on another. That ‘another’ is their own person and is not you. They cannot know what you feel or think. Though they can be in harmony with you, there is often so much of one’s own stuff occurring internally and arising in each moment that they cannot hope to behave or be different at all and certainly not comply with your notions, expectations, wishes and view of them or the world.

Anyone is conceivably capable of anything

Remember that in each of us is everything, and given the right set of circumstances, experiences or pressures, it is possible that any or each of us can be pushed, potentially, to be anything. And so, be in the moment to see who you are Being and who it is the people with whom you live and interact with are Being, and remember that even satisfied, functional, happy people can do the weirdest or strangest of things … and even they can do things that seem improper, unconventional, or inappropriate to you…

No hard ’n’ fast Rules

For every rule there is an exception, and for every sweeping statement there are countless examples of where generalizations do not apply or where they fall short or miss the mark. It is for you to learn where, along the continuum, is best for you to live in all respects. It does not matter how much evidence or research has been conducted about something, living that way may simply not work for you…

You’re only kidding yourself, you’re only playing the fool

No one gets away with anything, everything is known, always—to each other, to yourself, to life. So, whatever you do, and know yourself to do, you know. Whatever you do, wherever you go and however risky, cool, or defiant, however naughty or bad, is something for which each person feels the consequences. It is simply the thought that you will not experience the counter-energy that leaves people thinking that they can wash their hands with impunity, as if nobody knows. The thing is that you are tainted (or painted) energetically with all that you do, and you will attract people into your life who will reflect and reveal to you the truth of the energy you are sponsoring and being in the world. You may consider yourself honest until someone deceives you and fail to see how you lied to yourself about who you are, or what you love or, indeed, it may reveal how you have deceived another in the past through your actions. This is nothing to fear but something to revere for it shows the unseen hands of life orchestrating events precisely in response to our choices, and others step forward to divinely serve us our own awakening through the ‘justice’ of life. You cannot possibly know how perfect or precise, how beautiful the justice and how it lovingly enters your life and weaves its way into your heart in order to play itself out. It can come in a myriad of ways, and in the most unlikely or benign of circumstances, and still it comes. You cannot outwit, outsmart, outtalk or outplay yourself or universal laws. You can think you can, and therein create more unfavourable energy, and still this is fine too, for it will serve to teach you and through it you will learn how to grow.

Making a difference

Many of us have big dreams and even greater wishes to outshine and make a beautiful life for ourselves and others. We have a deep calling that fuels restlessness within us that wishes to shine bright, live well and serve humanity. Yet, the great gift we can give is who are being and how we are mastering our energy in each moment for in so doing we become the very agent for change like the butterfly effect that sees the movement of wings in one place serve as the catalyst that orchestrates a tsunami of change elsewhere. Sometimes, we are acquiring skills, other times overcoming difficulties and sometimes we are resting as we marinate in the sweetness of life preparing for the ancient gifts and talents we hold within to surface and be rearranged to form the perfect mosaic that fits the masterpiece that is our life.

Your freedom resides in you

All this talk of freedom and the mind runs wild with possibilities, yet it often fails to see what freedom means or the consequences attached to it. It thinks that freedom in the world means it can do what it wants to anyone as it pleases without recourse. To many, freedom is such a beautiful, powerful and even relaxing word. Yet, freedom can very often mean freedom to choose how you respond to life, the freedom to think (or indeed the freedom from thought itself), freedom to stay or leave, the freedom to act or pause, the freedom to allow your emotions to course through you or the freedom to attach yourself to emotions and feel a certain way, and the like. You are free to do anything, of course, yet attached to actions are also consequences based on the energy you are being and that is what you will receive in your life. If you are being love and light, then that is what you shall receive. If you are being joy and beauty that is also what you shall receive. And yet, if you are being anger and hatred, what do you think shall be the consequence? It is not anything to fear or seek to evade, it just is what it is. We all know this instinctively, yet the beauty of the ‘game’ of life is that we all get to test our theories or beliefs, and we all get to experience our real desires, which may indeed be the consequences that follow from having done whatever we choose.

Closing the gap between wanting and having

Focus, clarity, determination and belief can draw what you want closer to you out of sheer willpower and force, and this is the standard or most obvious way; yet, how many people really know what they want? Sometimes we say we want something, yet if it is not a heart-held wish it does not seem to eventuate, or indeed if it is simply something we say only to be followed by a flurry of thoughts that deny or deride that wish then it seems that the negative beliefs and limitations override the positive choice. In some moments, we are called to surmount or overcome obstacles and at other times we are required to transcend them by rising above them or healing ourselves such that they dissolve. If we have courage of our convictions through clarity, understanding, knowing and true perception then that which arises externally is simply something that we are to overcome, move beyond or climb above…

Again, maintaining your focus and remaining clear about what you want is the key. Very often, doing that which brings you joy is the surest way to manifest that which you love, quickly. For instance, what do you like doing? That is what you do, for in doing it you will be the energy of joy, aliveness, passion and love for you like it, right? Indeed, that is which shapes your purpose and directs the way. And the energy you instinctively and innately hold in each moment as a way of being then circulates or reticulates within and around you, manifesting itself by the law of attraction into each and all successive moments as a natural extension of the energy you are being. Of course, you can do that which pays you well, yet if there is no joy in it, it becomes incumbent on us to find the joy. Very often, we choose not what our heart likes but what our mind wants. We think we want fame and fortune, accolades and achievements, when we really just wish to be acknowledged and supported, honoured and appreciated by those we love and who love us and within by ourselves. We wish to feel loved. At times, our decision to help or serve may be all that is required for us to find ourselves in the flow and ending up in places that best utilise our skillset and speak to our heart! And yet, there are many things that happen or occur in life that remain unknown, so be sure to enjoy the ride… The extent to which we can live in a state of balance and acknowledge the fullness, wholeness and completeness we are for longer and longer moments the greater chance that our energy of thankfulness and oneness with the perfection of life will create and call forth more of the same in our lives too.

Nothing said here, or anywhere else, is ever new. Remember that all we are doing is remembering what you have chosen to forget for a time, so that we may enhance the experience of living here again!